Why Photography?

Why Photography….

Photography for me is an excuse to be someplace I otherwise don’t belong. It gives me both a point of connection and a point of separation.

I take photos because it makes me happy. It lets me see the world from many different perspectives and to see the things I missed when I take them into the editing program. Another thing is that the more photos I take, the more people that can not go out to see for themselves enjoy them from afar

 

Landscape Photography

Capturing something like a landscape, demonstrates how big the world is and how beautiful it can be once you stop the have a look. Nowadays, everything has to be “right now”, rushed, no time to observe your surroundings. But the minute you stop…take a breath… and look!

Black and White

To me black and white photography looks amazing–when it’s done right. The reason I say that is because it is not just taking all the color out and making the photo dark, and especially not just slapping on a black and white filter. There is more to work with if you want to get it right. The colors become shades of grey or Tonal Contrast. So now your editing the highlights, dark tones, etc.

Black and white photography is great for showing emotions. As well as a ageless quality because we still think black and white as a throwback to photographic history. My black and white photography aren’t the best since I still have to master the skill.

 

All of my photography that I do is all done on my iPhone 6s Plus and editing in Lightroom and Snapseed. If you would like to check out more of my photos you can follow my photography page on Instagram @acade_photography or my Facebook page.

The “I don’t know what to say” Syndrome 

Not exactly a real syndrome but it’s what I and many other people have around the world. So here are a few approaches towards overthrowing this condition. 

The “Problem”

A frequent issue among people is having an empty head when it comes to what to say next. Speaking from experience and on going issue, your talking with someone and then arise a very uncomfortable and awkward silence. If you know me, then we may have experienced this, haha. 

What can I do to overcome this challenge? 

Here’s what I’m working on

Why is this even coming up?

First and foremost, a few reasons why I think we are experiencing these issues. One reason is that we are not is our “world”. Our comfort zone (meaning for example that you go to a party to watch the NFL Super Bowl but know nothing about the sport while the other people are huge fans). 

But a common reason why we may run into this problem is that we feel that we have to say the right thing. To avoid appearing stupid for saying the wrong thing or asking the wrong question. Or you may want to impress someone. 

For me, I can say these three reason are the culprits to my dilemma or not knowing what to say. 

1: Listen to your high school teachers. 

Teachers would always ask the student if they have any questions and to always participate in class. There’s no wrong question or no wrong answer ( I beg to differ to the “no wrong answer”, people are wrong a lot). But anyways, you don’t always have to have the perfect answer. The only person expecting you have to the perfect answer to everything is you. 

Having such goal can accumulate performance anxiety and it screws with your mind and does not help you improve anything. So now your mind is paralyzed and now have nothing to say next. 

2: Thinking is good and all, but don’t think too hard. 

Don’t think too much, you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. When you think too much you tend to have your focus inwards. You become self conscious, start to question yourself and fear what the future may bring. You get stuck between options for what to say and nothing comes out.

So you need to step back and bring your awareness with you to the present moment and start thinking outwards again. Thus, focusing on what people are actually saying and what is happening around you and your conversation. 

This is called your natural headspace. This is where you are when you are with your family and friends. 

But Aaron, I can’t get into this comfortable and social headspace you speak of around other people! 

No need to worry imaginary person! All you have to do is just Breathe or/and Observe and Assume Rapport. 

Breathe, rapport…huh???

Breathe or/and Observe. In order to connect with this comfortable state you need to focus on your breathing and/or observe and take in your surroundings with all your 6 senses…oh wait…forgot you guys only have the normal 5 senses. I have the extra one 🙂 haha, Shhh 😳! 

Assume Rapport. By this I mean, don’t go into a meeting/conversation/social gathering, etc. thinking “how will this go” and very nervous and worried. Assume your going in and meeting with a good friend and that you are you to establish a good conversation or connection (Rapport). Then you should automatically slid on into your comfort zone and mindset of your just with another good friend of yours. 

3: Curious George 

When you are stuck in some kind of negative emotional state then you are closed up. You tend to create division in your world and mind. You create barriers between you and other things/people.

So here’s the trick. If you become curious then you body and mind permeates with joy, anticipation and eagerness. Which then opens you up. And when you are open and enthusiastic then you have more fun things to think about than focusing on your nervousness or fear. So be curious.

Alright now your curious, but don’t get stuck in the questions game where the conversation turns into an interrogation. Mix the questions up with making statements. Instead of asking them what’s their favorite kind of music, just tell them what your favorites are and then let them carry forward from the statement. 

4: Associate 

Find something in what you are already talking about to help you move into the next topic. The topic of camping gear on TV can help you bounce over to the time you and your family got trapped in a rain storm in just a tint. And then you and the people in the conversation can go on to talking about family or maybe the other rain storm or camping experiences. 

You can also find inspiration for topics by simply observing your surroundings. Which goes back to just breathing and observation. 

5. Prepare.

The tips above should help you out but if you get really stuck anyway then you may want prepare and have a few topics in your mental back pocket.

The person you are talking to. Again, curiosity is good because people like to talk about themselves.

Passions. People love to share positive emotions and usually like to know what makes the other person tick.

Watercooler topics and the news. It never hurts to be updated on what’s happening in the world.
Again thanks for reading and please follow for future post updates and comments. And share if you can. Much Appreciated! 

Easily Emotionally Attached 

If your anything like me then you will understand how bad it is to meet someone and quickly and easily get attached to that person and to just to get hurt. 
If a girl shows the slightest of affection towards me, I almost instantly start to get clingy and start to really like or “fall in love” so to speak. And it’s not like I’m trying hard to find anybody at this moment, I don’t mind waiting. Love is Patients! So why do I start to obsess or latch onto others?

I discovered that I didn’t feel accepted for a long time and when someone accepted me and made me feel understood, I started to fall for them- hard.

If that person obviously does not like you in that way, why are you still chasing them?

We cannot force people to want to be in our lives.

I believe that if you practice self-love and to try and enjoy your own company/solitude, you won’t be so attached to the person.

Instead of chasing, just be still. Work on yourself, explore your passions, go on an adventure and discover who you are.

Keep reminding yourself that and one day, you won’t feel the need to attach so easily.

Another reason could be that you aren’t completely happy with yourself and/or your life. So you feel the need (unknowingly) to depend on someone else to give you happiness, comfort, acceptance, company, excitement, security, etc. 

You need to learn to have more CONFIDENCE in yourself and love yourself enough to create a life YOU LOVE living in. You need to change your mindset and yourself so you don’t need anyone to add excitement into your life because you’re lacking it.

It isn’t easy but it’s do-able with a lot of determination and perseverance. Trust yourself. Learn to dismiss those negative thoughts. Make your life into something that is exciting so you won’t NEED someone else. It’s dangerous to feel like you need to have someone in your life. You are gonna be dependent on them for everything and that is just bad news.

Would I Stay or Would I Go

Military is a big decision! Somebody asked me “If I were to get my life back together, would I stay?” Having my life together would consist of a great job, living on my own or with girlfriend/wife, a car, gym membership, actual friends, etc. But…would I stay? 
I know the military could be dangerous. We [USA] wouldn’t be where we are if we didn’t have a military or weren’t dangerous. If every man and woman listened to their parents or significant other telling them not to join then I don’t know how we would have gotten through in this world. Our government would be controlled differently, we’ll have terrorist running around all Willy nilly. So, we don’t listen, at least not all of us, and we go in to support our country as much as we can. I believe if everyone served at least 1 contract in any branch, the world would be a better place. 

I tend to always want more, always expect more out of things and people. I want my life to be a little bit more exciting and I don’t seem to get it from just being a citizen. I can sit here and prevent hackers from penetrating into a company’s database or whatever. But I could also travel around and prevent terrorist from penetrating into the governments systems. I could be a security guard for a bar or some random company protecting people from hurting each other, bar fights, etc. but being a security guard for the US Embassy over seas sounds a little more interesting. Going through many tough trainings to protect more sensitive information and valuable people. 

Another thing is that you have to chance of developing a brotherhood more substantial than any other. Yes, you can become best friends with your next door cubicle buddy but that’s not the same. Having somebody travel with you for 4 – 20 years, having to trust them and know they have your back and you watching their back until death is another thing. 

So I repeat the question at hand. Would I stay?

No!

Living with Parent(s)

Good day folks! Just like the title says, Living with Parent(S). Been living with my mom and her husband or whatever he is now. But it’s been like 2 and half weeks and I have been trying to start over. You know the how it is! Job, money, apartment, etc. 
Let starts with how it is living back with her since the last time I lived with my mom is 9 years old. And knowing that it was at 9 years old that I was taken away and I don’t know too much about my mom, but being with her now feels like I don’t know her at all. She’s not doing drugs anymore, she is drinking and smoking cigarettes which is kind of a more normal activity. The things is, the guy she’s with and her both drink and smoke nonstop. Going to the store everyday to buy a new case of bear. The beer is killing them obviously but the only thing that’s noticeable is maybe slower brain functions. I only say this because I can’t seem to hold a conversation with her. I already get angry when L doesn’t listen to me at all and I have to repeat myself-no wait, that’s actually a lot of people that I’m around. They’re trying to talk over when and get the attention but anyways. My mom hears me and listens to me but is not even understanding me at all. I’ll bring something up, whether it’s a question or just a statement and she’ll just look at me and does the whole I’m listening head movement thing and eye contact but then in her responses it’ll be something completely different. A different topic. So it’s hard to hold a conversation with her sometimes. 
Other than that I put in tons of applications to places all over. My mom gets a bus pass every month but doesn’t really use it. She said I could use it to get to places. And I got a call about getting an interview and everything for the next day. I would tell you how the interview went but I can’t because I had to cancel. My moms bus pass is only a reduced fare and I still need to pay the other half of the fare, but guess what, I can’t because I don’t have any money. Think someone will help with a ride, but no. Doesn’t matter anyways because I would need a ride everyday or money until my first pay paycheck. Can’t get a job because can’t get there, can’t ride the bus- no money, can’t make money- no job- can’t get to the job. Just a cycle. HELP!
And yes I have one dread left…(next post) 
Oh and it’s snowing!!! Time to get back into snowboarding right?!?!

The Return

I’m back…back in Buffalo, back to short hair, back to black and best of all I’m back with you guys! Did you think I forgot about you? Man! I haven’t been posting in a while, so let me rewind this back a little bit. 

Alright I was being left behind in Brocton, NY where L, his mom T and I were staying and then she decided to come and get L and leave me. (Someone please let me know if your getting tired of the name abbreviations or if it’s getting confusing, I will stop and use first names). T came back for the rest of her stuff and randomly decided “oh, your coming with us, can’t just leave you here”. So I went along ended up back in Downtown Buffalo. As I’m staying everything is slowly getting bad in the couple weeks of being there. Everyone arguing, fighting, yelling, it’s pretty crazy. Plus I’m not welcome there anyways. Had to leave that place. 

I wondered on down to my mom’s house and been staying here for about 2 1/2 weeks now. I’ll do an in depth post about this later but, it’s a great place to stay at until I get back on my feet and move out…again…but this time I won’t be forced. 

Wwhhhooooaaaa! Did someone say “back to short hair”?! Yes, I wouldn’t say short hair necessarily right now. I just don’t have any dreads. Maybe just one! (Next Post) 

Oh yeah…didn’t I tell you, I been teaching myself Svenska(Swedish) for no reason at all for the last month and a half or so. 

Hallå, hur mår du? Tack för läsning! 

Then There were 2

This is a post I forgot to unload a day ago but here you guys go. 

T is gone and took L with her. I couldn’t go with, which is fine. She came back yesterday and took the dogs and then one of the cats ran away somehow. Now it’s just me and the one cat that doesn’t like me at all. Hmm. 
Since she has to be out of the apartment by the 30th or something, that means I have like 9 days to figure out where I’m going to go and how I’m going to get there, but I do know it won’t be with T again. Even if I could I probably wouldn’t. 

Could things get worst?

Yes!

Did it?

No?

“Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” Luke 6:38

As I was worrying about the food situation for those 9 days with only $20 from T. Putting up with her and being treated like crap and being asked to take care of her dogs for a little and asked to do this and that and only getting $20. I don’t know either! I don’t usually ask for anything in return but in this situation, you bet I will want something from her. She already owes me a few things. Anyways all the giving is turning out to be good because last night I’m laying down sort of watching TV, isn’t anything else to do, no internet for games or whatever, no movies, no friends, and then I get a knock at the door a couple times :)- not going to get into that- but someone was knocking and I answered it. 

It was my neighbor(the new guy) and he knows someone named J very closely and I know J from the library, so small world or maybe just small town. He offered to bring me some food over. You know, some donuts, chips, drinks, etc. No I don’t have to worry too much about how I’m going to eat and now I can focus on where I’m going to live. Trading one for the other. 

Don’t worry I will get back into my usual blog, information type post. I’m 50/50 on these quick update post because I like to have order and a certain theme for each post, I don’t like just skipping around and putting whatever comes to mind about that week, past few days or whatever. Like just simple single topics.