Easily Emotionally Attached 

If your anything like me then you will understand how bad it is to meet someone and quickly and easily get attached to that person and to just to get hurt.
If a girl shows the slightest of affection towards me, I almost instantly start to get clingy and start to really like or “fall in love” so to speak. And it’s not like I’m trying hard to find anybody at this moment, I don’t mind waiting. Love is Patients! So why do I start to obsess or latch onto others?

I discovered that I didn’t feel accepted for a long time and when someone accepted me and made me feel understood, I started to fall for them- hard.

If that person obviously does not like you in that way, why are you still chasing them?

We cannot force people to want to be in our lives.

I believe that if you practice self-love and to try and enjoy your own company/solitude, you won’t be so attached to the person.

Instead of chasing, just be still. Work on yourself, explore your passions, go on an adventure and discover who you are.

Keep reminding yourself that and one day, you won’t feel the need to attach so easily.

Another reason could be that you aren’t completely happy with yourself and/or your life. So you feel the need (unknowingly) to depend on someone else to give you happiness, comfort, acceptance, company, excitement, security, etc.

You need to learn to have more CONFIDENCE in yourself and love yourself enough to create a life YOU LOVE living in. You need to change your mindset and yourself so you don’t need anyone to add excitement into your life because you’re lacking it.

It isn’t easy but it’s do-able with a lot of determination and perseverance. Trust yourself. Learn to dismiss those negative thoughts. Make your life into something that is exciting so you won’t NEED someone else. It’s dangerous to feel like you need to have someone in your life. You are gonna be dependent on them for everything and that is just bad news.


Living with Parent(s)

Good day folks! Just like the title says, Living with Parent(S). Been living with my mom and her husband or whatever he is now. But it’s been like 2 and half weeks and I have been trying to start over. You know the how it is! Job, money, apartment, etc.
Let starts with how it is living back with her since the last time I lived with my mom is 9 years old. And knowing that it was at 9 years old that I was taken away and I don’t know too much about my mom, but being with her now feels like I don’t know her at all. She’s not doing drugs anymore, she is drinking and smoking cigarettes which is kind of a more normal activity. The things is, the guy she’s with and her both drink and smoke nonstop. Going to the store everyday to buy a new case of bear. The beer is killing them obviously but the only thing that’s noticeable is maybe slower brain functions. I only say this because I can’t seem to hold a conversation with her. I already get angry when L doesn’t listen to me at all and I have to repeat myself-no wait, that’s actually a lot of people that I’m around. They’re trying to talk over when and get the attention but anyways. My mom hears me and listens to me but is not even understanding me at all. I’ll bring something up, whether it’s a question or just a statement and she’ll just look at me and does the whole I’m listening head movement thing and eye contact but then in her responses it’ll be something completely different. A different topic. So it’s hard to hold a conversation with her sometimes.
Other than that I put in tons of applications to places all over. My mom gets a bus pass every month but doesn’t really use it. She said I could use it to get to places. And I got a call about getting an interview and everything for the next day. I would tell you how the interview went but I can’t because I had to cancel. My moms bus pass is only a reduced fare and I still need to pay the other half of the fare, but guess what, I can’t because I don’t have any money. Think someone will help with a ride, but no. Doesn’t matter anyways because I would need a ride everyday or money until my first pay paycheck. Can’t get a job because can’t get there, can’t ride the bus- no money, can’t make money- no job- can’t get to the job. Just a cycle. HELP!
And yes I have one dread left…(next post)
Oh and it’s snowing!!! Time to get back into snowboarding right?!?!